I think we all know my life is far from easy. In fact I haven’t really had anything easy—emotionally, physically, socially and mentally. Tonight I’m struggling in pain, dizziness and being lightheaded. When I enter these awful places I start to dwell and get upset. The worst is when I can’t sleep. The tossing and turning doesn’t help at all. Tonight I listed everything that I don’t get to do and what tends to happen to me. It sucks to be honest. I’ve missed out on a lot of opportunities and it makes me so upset. I’m also dwelling on going back to school. I really really have a horrible feeling about this semester. I don’t know why, maybe I feel like I’ll be so sick again. I don’t want to leave my house and my family. I haven’t had this feeling in a while. I know I’ve come so far but I’m not there yet. It’s a struggle but I can’t wait for the day that I do get there and I do get to have a life and I do get to understand being normal as much as I can.